HIV Bareback Sex

Surprised

I posted an HIV Bareback Sex on Craig's List.

Gay Top
35yo,
6'0",
185 lbs
7" x 0" Cut
WHITE

your stats and pics in a EMAIL......PLEASE.

Looking for a smooth bottom for THIS MORNING.


This BLACK guy ATTACKED me for no reason at all. I have the right to defend myself. Here is a lowlife response from this guy

Reply to: anon-86174186@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-07-22, 8:23AM PDT

This guy is so sad Iam 23 yrs old and you would think an 35 yr old American Male would pay attention to such disease I cannot belive there are people like this that exist in the world and think so nasty and no care about Aids think what you are doing when you go to Cg i think CG SHOULD ban people who post such nasty and trashy things on men seeking men THERE has to be some type of ban it is 2005 and this world just dont get it. I also belive that everyone that comes to this site should be ready to face Aids and other disease when you click on Cg just be ready to face it why? beacuse its like this guy who post HIV sex 35 that keeps Aids alive in the world dont say Africa has a problem of Aids I think America has a problem of Aids 1st So If you are reading this today or next week please click to another human being that respect clean sex and safe sex you can take this advise from an 23 year old african american instead of an 35 yr old WHITE american thank you be safe guys.


Here's another ATTACK by that negro!

Reply to: anon-86201975@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-07-22, 10:00AM PDT

Hello guys I'm the guy who posted today african american 23 yrs old Hollywood California. I am leting everyone know watch out for the White male who is ashmed who he is. This guy would not post a face pic of himself only hisHIV + D___. Yes only you would see his d___, but you dont know when you s___ it there will be trouble in your mouth, ass & all over take advise from a 23 year old who is safe. There are to many discrepancies with this guy I wish he would just j___ off by himself HAHAHAHAH


My response.........that negro have lots of nerves to ATTACK me. I did nothing WRONG. I am being honest about my HIV status.

He has no right to COMPLAIN and ATTACK me about HIV Bareback sex.

I will leave with u this thought........Since people are having BAREBACK SEX, why are they complaining about HIV/AIDS?

7/20/05

This morning, I picked up my mail at the post office. I finally got SOD magazine. They haven't sent the other issues I missed. I took the rapid bus to Beverly Center. I went across the street to Beverly Connection. I went up to the movies. I noticed the movies was closed. Man, I realized I was at the wrong theater. I went inside some store. I asked a black worker about the theater. He mentioned it was closed for a long time.

I went to Beverly Center. I was one hour earlier. I read SOD magazine to kill some time. 15 till, the theater was opened. I got one ticket for Star Wars Episode 3 Revenge Of The Sith. It was, by far, the best prequel movie ever. The other movies sucks.

I got hungry. I haven't eat lunch. I went to Ralphs for a while. They didn't have anything at all; no special on candy. I looked around the drug store; no candy either. I waited to eat when I get home. I took 105 to Santa Monica, then I took 105 home. I noticed that Ronald was still waiting for the bus this morning! LOL. I crossed the street and told him that! He mentioned he was already went home and take a nap. He showed me the Jury letter. Boy, he didn't want to serve the jury, but who does? I sure don't.

I went home and eat a pot pie. I watched One Life To Live on tape. We learned one of the Killing Club killers - it was Marcia's book agent! There wasn't a real surprise. Everyone knew that he was a killer for the longest. It was writing on the wall. The twist is.......there are two killers. I didn't see that one coming. John figured there was two last week or so. I guessed tomorrow, we will find out who is the other killer.

That was the funfilled day. I supposed to have sex with this guy in the evening. I was too tired from my day. Oh well.

First Time

Peter called me in the morning. It was about time he called. Last week, I invited him to go to the Hollywood Bowl with me. We haven't talk since then. He loves classical music. He made a quite stop at the bank, then he came over. I cooked us some speggetti. We watched The Avaitor with Leonardo DiCaprio. It was a interesting movie. Leo did a wonderful job.

After the movie, I took a quick shower. After 6 PM, we took bus 4 to Rite Aid. Peter brought us some drinks and candy. Peter was too busy, putting the stuff away that he gave me the phone to talk to Brian. Brian mentioned he got off at the subway at Vermont/Santa Monica. I didn't tell Peter at all. I gave back the phone. We crossed the parking lot. We saw each other across the street. I tried to call Brian, but he won't pick up. He knows better! LOL

Bus 4 came. Nah, we didn't take that bus. I mentioned we can take the same bus, 156. Brian got off the bus. We continued to the Hollywood Bowl. We were one hour earlier. The Hollywood Bowl was beautiful. Jack finally arrived 30 minutes later. Jack sat behind us. Peter & Jack got along fabulous. Peter can't remember him from the old days.

We pulled a trick on Jack during the intermission. We moved up a roll; I felt crowded - three latino men sat next to me. Jack was back. He didn't notice we moved up a roll. He sat behind us! LOL.

The concert lasted after 10 PM. I had a nice time. The weather was cool. The music was beautiful. We went home - Jack got off at Hollywood, Peter got off at Gower and I got off at Vermount. I started to bite my nails again! I took bus 4 home. I got home after 11 PM.

This entry has 1 comments:

I found your journal and I like it. I'm a straight pos woman who lives with two Gay guys, a long term relationship, 10 years. I battle with depression. I understand you. Our interests in life are similar too. I'm also a writer who gets distracted. lol Write me. Check out my journal too. Called Wishing and Hoping. Thanks. Nelishia

Comment from nelishianatl - 7/20/05 8:46 AM

Hollywood Bowl

Happy

I am going to HOLLYWOOD BOWL for the first time in my life tonight at 8 PM.

I am really excited about it.

I am taking my good friend with me.

He loves classical music.

It will be "ALL BEETHOVEN" with the LA Philharmonic.

Disneyland

Happy

Today was Disneyland's 50th Anniversary.

Happy Birthday!

I lived in LA over ten years. I have never been to Disneyland.

The only theme parks I went to was Universal Studios park with my ex, Miguel, in January 2000. We had a nice time.

I went to Knot Berry Farm with his family in the summer. I rode my FIRST ever rollercoaster.

Man, I won't ride one again. The rollercoaster was too much for me! LOL

One of these days, I will go to Disneyland!

7/17/05

Happy

I just stayed home today. I was planning to go to church, but I didn't feel like it. I haven't been to church in a very long time.

I watched The Mummy Returns; love that movie.

I shaved my head again!

That is about it.

7/16/05

Happy

This morning, I went to the post office....only Entertainment Weekly was there.

There was no Soap Opera Digest magazine. That really sucks. I should get them weekly. Yet, I haven't recieve a new one over two weeks.

SOD was NEVER EVER like this before. I always get it on time.

I went to Best Buy for over an hour. I wanted to get The Jeffersons Season 1/2. There was none, except one copy of season 3. I already had it. I haven't watch season 3. I want to start from the beginning.

I looked at the movies. Some were $10. I got three movies - The Mummy Returns, The Scoripon King and Ever After.

I went home.....I checked my SOD subsciption online. I still have 11 months of SOD. I ordered the magazine two months ago.

I completely forgot to watch Big Brother 6 on CBS. I listened to disco music on KBIG. I have to see my VCR for Saturday nights.

DVD TV shows list

Happy Disco

All In The Family season 1 - 4

Boy Meets Boy season 1

Diff'rent Strokes season 1

The Fresh Prince season 1

Good Times season 1 - 4

Green Acres season 1

The Jeffersons season 3

The Osbournes season 1

Soap season 1

South Park season 2

Speed Racer Volume 2

Three's Company season 1 - 3

227 season 1

What's Happening season 1 - 2

Big Rig chase

There is a LIVE big rig chase on the highway right now on UPN 13 in Los Angeles.

It started after 10 PM. There are three armed suspects and the driver.

They are holding the driver at gun point.

Timmee80

Mischievous

Timmy sent me an email at yahoo about my ad on Craig's List.

dude - does that mean you're poz?

This was my response.......

I did put HIV in the title.
I am not hiding nothing.
Earlier this evening, a guy came over
we had sex......he was merely a bottom.
after we sex, i mentioned i was HIV +
man, the look on his face was priceless.
it dawned on him that I may infected him with HIV.
He was upset - he didn't know that I was HIV +.
He was ready to kick my ass.
I told him that I will call the police on him
I didn't do anything wrong.
What can i say?
He wanted me to have bareback sex.
I don't see any problem at all.
Oh well, life goes on.
He can't blame me for giving him HIV.

Hit Man 4 Hire

By Kazz Falcon

I don’t believe in suicide
I won’t dare to kill myself
Suicide was the farthest thing from my mind
I was unhappy with my life
I was stuck in life
I just can’t go up in life
I want to make something out of my life
I don’t want to be on SSI forever
No one was willing to give me a shot
I felt like a failure
I was miserable
There must be a way to end my life besides suicide
I won’t go there
I got an excellent ideal
Why don’t I hire a hit man?
They will get a job done for a price
I had enough money, $3,000
I must keep a low profile
I don't want to get in trouble with the police
Damn! It was hard to find one in person
I searched on the web
I posted an ad on Craig’s List
Is anyone interest of being a hit man for hire?


This entry has 1 comments:

Wow, what pain and yet such clarity of purpose at the same time. Please email me at makoshrike@hushmail.com if you'd like to talk further about this. Thank you.

Comment from makoshrike - 7/21/05 8:33 AM

Me, A Flake?

Mischievous

I was supposed to have sex with this guy, Edward, in the morning. He lives in my neighborhood, two blocks from me.

I took a shower, then he could come over. I was all ready, it took more than a shower to be refresh.

We didn't have sex.

This morning, a friend showed up unexpectedly. Last night, he crashed his car. He didn't have the money to fix the car. He came to me for some money. I didn''t have any cash on me. We went to the bank. I am getting tired of bailing him out of everything all the time. He needs to take responsiable for his own actions.

Old Friend, Jack

I ran into an old friend, Jack, on the bus. He mentioned I can get free concert tickets for Hollywood Bowl for next Tuesday, July 19. I went to the post office first, then I picked up the tickets. I am pretty excited about the concert. It will be my first time to go to Hollywood Bowl.

BALD again!

Happy

This afternoon, I decided to be BALD again! I looked awesome with a bald head. My head is very natural round.

I will take pics of my bald head tomorrow.

I cut me a few times. No biggie thou.

With all the heat, it was a good ideal.

Nasty Message

Surprised

This early morning, I checked my messages.

Man, oh man!

Michael Crouch left the most nasty message EVER!

Some friend he turned out to be.

He is such a low life alcoholic!

Movies

Happy

All I did today was watch movies all day long with a friend. Miguel had the day off from work.

Lord Of The Rings, Saturday Night Fever, and The Mummy.

Michael Crouch left a message during Saturday Night Fever. I didn't answer the phone. I knew what the phone call was about - his yahoo email account!

Michael Crouch

Surprised

This early morning, Michael Crouch called me about his problems at his apartment building. His downstair neighbors played the music loud all the time. He told his "two faced" manager about it. She won't do anything about it. The two faced was Mike's exact words, not mine. He even let her to hear the noice from his place. When he is LOUD, the neighbors complained about him. The manager told him to keep it down.

He don't like the mexicans any more. He thinks that they are ganging up on him in the building. He wants to move to a new place, maybe leave LA altogether. He have been wating to leave LA for the longest time not because of the mexicans. He was tired of LA; he wants something new in his life.

Mike wants me to hold his things when he move. I mentioned I can't. I really don't have enough space in my place. He needs to find somewhere else.

Mike asked "Did the people ever gang up on you?" I told him that no one ever did. Why should people gang up on me? I am the nicest person you ever meet. Of course, with a dark side! LOL.
Few hours later, Mike leave me a NASTY MESSAGE on my phone. He had one more final thing to say. He felt like I was being dishonest; I was very deceptive. He called me a DAMN LIAR! Say what? He felt like I lied to him about people ganging up on me. Not all people get gang up on. He never ever wants to be friends with me. He don't want it. He outgrown our friendship; he got his own place. He have other resources for the internet. He wished he never mentioned about his problems in the building; I was not the one to talk to about it. He believed I was never honest about who I am.

Well, Mike was at it AGAIN!

Few monthes ago, Mike claimed that Brian tried to rape him. Say what? Come on now! Brian will never ever do such a thing. I was there when the so called rape happened. I was sick. Mike was leaving. Brian was nice enough to give him a goodbye hug.

For some reason, Mike loves to start trouble with me. He have some screws lose! I bet his alcohol problem FINALLY sunk into his tiny brain.

Yes, I say it!

MICHAEL CROUCH IS A ALCOHOLIC!

In the past, he mentioned a FEW times that he needs to stop drinking; he claimed to be a alcoholic. He spends lots of moneyon alcohol, mostly at the gay clubs.

Last Email

Happy

Hello, Chris

Once you read this LAST email, never ever contact me again and come to my place either!

I said what I need to say in the letter you got from my door yesterday.

You will never get your clothes back.

I don't ole you NOTHING, not even your clothes.

I promised u won't get your clothes.

Please don't show up at my place again or I will call the police on your sorry ass.

Have a nice life.

Messages from Chris

Mischievous

I got three messages from that lowlife on Friendster.


Message 1

KAZZ,YOU HAVE TO GIVE ME MY CLOTHES BECAUSE MY I.D. IS THERE..PLS...OTHERWISE ...................YOU DON'T KNOW ME THAT WELL YET........PLS, I NEED MY CLOTHES...MY IDENTIFICATION CARD IS THERE WICH I USE FOR MY WORK....

My response......in this journal.....no less.

I don't have to give anything back to him. I don't want to know him any more. He treated me like trash since the day I met him.


Message 2

YOU KNOW O GOTS TO WORK THIS FRIDAY, SO I NEED MY ID.....YOU HAVE TO GIVE ME BACK MY CLOTHES....SORRY IF I DISRESPECTED YOU AND YOU'RE PLACE IN ANYWAY...I PROMISE NOT TO THAT AGAIN...AND I WILL BE OUT OF YOU'RE LIFE AS SOON AS I GET MY CLOTHES BACK AND MY ID, OK....I HOPE YOU WILL BE UNDERSTANDING ON THIS MATTER...IT IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT I GET MY ID.....CHRIS

My response...

That's too bad. Oh well! He is gonna to miss work. He have to get a new alien ID.

"Sorry if I disrepect you..."

IF? What the hell? There is no IF about it. He really did disrespect me.


Message 3

I WOULD LIKE TO GET MY CLOTHES AS SOON AS POSSIBLE TODAY.......PLS. GIVE ME MY CLOTHES BECAUSE MY IDENTIFICatioN CARD IS THERE.....IT IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT I GET MY I.D.CHRISTIAN

My response...

Oooohhhh, too, too bad! He will never ever get his clothes back.

July 6

After 2 PM, I smoked during Cosby. Ken came down with his dogs to walk them. He mentioned that Chris was there for two hours, waiting for me last night. Ken told Chris that the police could settle the mess; he wants his clothes back. Also, Ken called the police; Chris wasn’t invited at my place last night. Chris left the property. Ken mentioned that Chris was around for two days. I went in and ate a salad.

4 PM – The phone rang. I peaked through the door. Man, oh man, it was Chris. I quickly turned off the TV. I don’t want any noise in my place. He will think I wasn’t home. I peaked through the window with him. Now, two of his friends were with him – a female and a male. I was scared for my life. I wasn’t safe at all. He brought a gang with him. Chris left a message on the phone, “Where’s my clothes?” I patiently waited for him to leave. Few minutes later, they drove off.

I waited till 5:20 PM for a smoke break. I heard some voices in the street. It was Ken and his friend. I sat down on the stairs. Ken walked up. He asked, “Have your friend show up?” I said, “Yes. I didn’t talk to him. He was with his two of his friends.” Ken mentioned I better watch out for him. I said, “Thanks.” Ken and his friend went to his place. I continued to smoke. I finished smoking and went inside.

I still have his red cap. I forgotten to cut it up yesterday. I took it to the dumpster. I went back inside.

I checked his messages on Friendster........to be continued in the next post.

The Sign

Happy

This morning, I took some pictures of the sign. I was wrong. It didn't say DO NOT ENTER like I said yesterday.

The sign...

"This property. Closed to the public. No entry without permission."

Well, you know what that means.

Trespassing!

Chris' Letter

Happy

The latest...

I watched Entertainment Tonight Celebrity Weddings Unveiled. Nikki from Y&R, my favourite soap, remarried her hubby of 20 years. Melody looked drop dead gorgous in her wedding grown. Her husband wasn't that all bad.

Wouldn't you know it? Chris showed up during the TV special. I was eating supper, an pot pie. I heard the letter ripped from the door. About 20 minutes, Chris went back and forth to the door and the window, trying his best to get my attention. I pay no mind to him. I didn't want to do anything with that lowlife any more. I just wanted to see Melody's wedding.

By now, I believed, Chris is gone for now! I bet Chris will show up again. I might as well stay in tomorrow. I don't want to see him ever again.

If Chris does show up, I will call the police for trespassing. I lived on private property. I am glad that Chuck, the apartment manager, put up the "Do Not Enter" sign last month!

Good night. Sweet dreams!

Chris' Clothes

Happy

In a previous post, I mentioned I cut up all his clothes. It's too bad I didn't take any pictures! I wished I did.

I left home after 10:30 AM with his cut up clothes. I waited for the bus. I took 4 to the Civic Center. I crossed the street to the subway entrance. I found a trash can near some seats. I put the bag on the seat. I unzipped the bag. I took his plastic bag out of my bag. I dumped his clothes in the trash can. Then, I caught the subway to Santa Monica/Vermont. I saw 304 right away. I caught the bus to Alavardo, then I got home before noon. I turned on the TV for Y&R. I laid down on the couch and watched the soap.

The next step - I will leave a letter on the door for him. Once he get the letter, he have to leave the property immediately! Hopefully, I will never see his sorry ass again.

This is the letter.........

Dear Chris Bobadilla

Once you get the letter, you have to leave the property immediately!

You will never get your clothes because Edward Scissorhands says so!

I want you to stay out of my life FOREVER.

I never ever want to see you again.

I don’t want you to come to my place either.

You are no longer welcome to my place.

You didn’t show me any RESPECT.

Respect goes a long way.

I washed my hands CLEAN OF YOU!

Please stay out of my life FOREVER!

July 5

Frustrated

I woke up after 7 AM. I heard some racket in the kitchen. I heard that he was fixing himself a burrito for breakfast. Right then and there, I made up my mind. He got to go NOW! I promised myself that once he was awake, we will leave. I went out for a quick smoke with connect 4. I finished my fag and noticed that Chris was under the covers on the couch. Forget breakfast, I brushed my teeth and got dressed. I mentioned I have things to do. Chris said, "I'm sleepy." Well, that wasn't my freaking fault! I told Chris to get up. He said, "five more minutes." Fine! That will be the last favor I ever do for that lowlife.

I looked at the clock. It was 5 till 8. I decided to finished my journal entry from last night, then I went to this entry before I forget something about today! LOL. It is NOW 8:42 AM. Since the entry is finished, it is time to wake up Chris. I gave him more than five minutes to rest up. I gave him 50 more minutes. See that, I was too damn kind for my own good!

We left after 9 AM. He didn't want to get up at all. I don't give a damn about him. He asked about the plans again. I mentioned I need to pay some bills and do some other things. We left my place. He wondered how tall I was, 6'. He was 5'8. I hardly speak to him walking. I just want to get rid of him FOREVER! He was a lowlife son of a bitch! I sat at the bus stop. He mentioned that he will be seeing me later. Well, wait till he get a BIG surprise from me - an bomb! It will explode up on his face, then I won't see his ugly face again! LOL.

Really, the bomb is very exploded. I thought about the bomb last night. It will be my REVENGE against him! All I need was a pair of scissors for some slashing! Hmm, I got chills thinking about that! I felt like Jason and Freddie all roll up in one.

I waited till I can't see him any more, then I went straight home to set off the bomb! I dumped all his clothes on the floor. I went through his pants pockets. I found his ALIEN ID. I set the bomb in motion. I cut up all his clothes and put them back in the bag. How sweet the revenge was! Now, he has nothing at all, nothing at all.

The next step - take his ruined clothes to a trash can somewhere far away from my place. I thought about going to Downtown LA; I don't think he will ever go down there to look for his clothes. Then again, I won't tell him what I did at all. He deserves no pity from me. I was all set ready to go. Why not? Downtown was a perfect place for his clothes. After all, skid row was there. Chris belongs in skid row, not my place!

Laters.....

Nightmare

Frustrated

The nightmare was back. I opened the door after 1 PM. Low and behold, Chris sat on the steps, waiting for me. I just played it off. I pretended I didn't know he was here. I smoked in my usual spot, playing connect 4. He just walked into my place without asking. I was sick and tired of the lowlife freeloader. If the firecrackers was legal in california, I will blow up his sorry ass in more ways than one. Hey, I am being honest with my feelings. There's nothing wrong with that. Are you listening, LAPD? Chris did me WRONG many times since the day I met that creep.

Like always, he made himself at home. He fell alseep on the red couch. Throughout the day, same old crap happened. He ate my food without asking. He is really a lowlife. Like I said before, no friend never ever treated like trash. He asked me a few times, "what's wrong?" Like a fool, I kept my mouth shut with the response, "nothing."

I wished I went to the picnic with Peter and Brian at Plummer Park in West Hollywood. I will never saw Chris today. Peter left two messages on the phone; I quickly called him back. I just want to stay home and relax. Earlier I sent him a text. Boy, staying home was a mistake. Once again, I was stuck with the lowlife. Peter begged me to go, but I didn't want to go out. He mentioned they may not work out at the gym today and may come over sometime in the afternoon. They didn't show up. Brian need to get to bed very early for work in the morning.

Get this....I noticed Chris had some kind of x rated video. I tried to sneak a peek. Chris was sleeping. I got on my knees......not that, u guys! LOL. Dear lord, it was an straight video! An hour later, he brought up the movie and wanted to watch it with me! Hmm, Chris is trying to turn me straight! HELL, NO! Nothing sexual happened between us. I got to admit, that was that fastest movie I ever saw! I dreadful didn't want to see the whole thing. Chris accidentally fastforward the movie a few times! Thank God!

I watched King In The Hill for a little while. Chris wanted to see the stupid movie. Chris turned the TV off, turn on the other TV and pop the movie in the DVD. He watched the movie on the white couch. I remained in the desk chair. The movie was aBJ with lots of women. Why gay guy want to see that? Not me.

Few times, he went online in the evening time. I hoped he will check his mail on Friendster. I had a feeling he already read the email I sent him. Why did he ask "what's wrong" few times? I know his game and he lost! He won't run me over any more. He pushed me to the limit of NO RETURN.

I smoked outside with connect 4. I noticed he was on the Friendster web site. I finished my smoke and made me a tv dinner, the very last tv dinner. He ate most of the tv dinners, corn and cereal throughout the week. He didn't brought up the email, nor did I.

I watched my favourite tabloid TV show, A Current Affair, on Fox 11. Wouldn't you know it? He cooked tuna/eggs without asking. He never ask me to eat my food, not even once. I kept my anger to myself. Man, I should have lash him out big time and kick him out right then and there. We watched The Simpsons, then we went to sleep.

July 3

Happy

Yesterday, I had a wonderful time with Peter & Brian. They called me on the bus from the gym; they wanted me to meet at Starbucks, then we will go straight to Glendale mall. I told them I will take 603 to the mall. Instead, I took the sunset bus and walked up to Hollywood Blvd. They were on their way on Bus 4 from home. I called them, "I will catch the 180 bus and meet you at the mall."

I went to Kay B Toys for a short while, then I waited outside of JC Penny, playing Connect 4. Peter called me, "We just left JC and was by Brookstone." He gave me directions on the phone. I have no ideal of where the store was. I found them on the second floor. Brian looked good in his new jeans. He went to Jc to take off the security tag; they forgot to take it off.

We ate Carl's Jr. They paid my meal. I don't keep any money on me. We chatted about Arnold, the worst Governor in California; their new phone plan with Verizon. Peter pointed out to Brian that it's best to cancel the new plan; his job will end at the end of the month. Peter made sense about it; Stella Got Her Groove- in real life, the lady found out that her husdand was gay and only married her for his green card. Brian pointed that there will be a new movie call "Stella Got Screwed." I bursted out laughing!

We went to Verizon Store. Brian made up his mind to call the phone service. I paid my bill; she mentioned I already have $42 credit. I told her that was fine. I used the ATM for $100. We looked at the phones till closing time. I like some of the new phones; some have the biggie screen.

We waited for the bus. Peter used the restroom. We missed the bus. Peter came out and we went down to the other bus stop with less people. The main one have lots of people. I wanted to be sure we will have a seat on the bus. The bus came; we sat in the back of the bus. I finally told Brian about the accounts; he mentioned they will find out and it was best to get a safe deposit box for the money. No thanx. I will take my chance on the account.

We got off on Western/Hollywood to take some movies back at Hollywood Video. Peter wanted some ice cream. We stopped by McDonald's on Sunset/Western. I was impressed by the new section 8 apartments. I wished I could have move there. I will have been closer to everything. We walked to Hollywood Video. They will take Queer As Folk Season 4 home again. They need to watch the last few episodes. We parted ways and went home.

Chris' Email

Happy

I went out after I got rid of the freeloader, Chris! I mentioned I have a date with this guy at the movies. Hey, sometimes, WE GOT TO LIE!

I just got my mail at the post office.

I came home and sent Chris an email

The apartment manager noticed u have been spending lots of time at my place.He mentioned u can no longer spend the nights with me; u worned out your welcome.It is best that u can spend the nights with another friend of yours.He also said he will be keeping a close eye on my apartment.I can't AFFORD to get into any more trouble at my place.

Hopefully, Chris read the email by now.

Sick Of Chris

I am officially sick of Chris Bobadilla. He got to go TOMORROW!

He is eating all my food without asking. I wanted the door open, he ALWAYS closed the door.

Since I know him over a week, I can't stand him any longer.

I don't have any more patience with him.

He is making a mess of my place. He don't clean up himself; I mean the sink. He left uneaten food in the sink. He leave it there till I clean it up.

No friends shouldn't be like that.

He is not respecting me or my place.

I am getting pist off big time.

Sometimes, we need to get angry. He is running me over big time.

I want it to STOP right now.

I will send him on his way tomorrow.

Top it all, I am too damn kind for my own good. I will put my foot down.

I wished I was Red from That 70's Show. I will put my foot up his ass!

My friends have NEVER treated me that way before.

Chris is not a TRUE friend.

Antonio Villaraigosa

Happy

I want the NEW mayor, Antonio Villaraigosa, to PARDON me for hiring a hit man to kill someone.

The FBI mentioned that I will be arrested the next time. That isn't right.

It's my life and I don't believe in suicide.

Thanx for your time.

Chris

Sad

Chris, Chris........what a damn liar! Yesterday, he claimed he got himself a job at a car auction. Work started at 7 AM this morining. It is now 8:50 AM and Chris is still snoring! It's not my responsible to get him up.

Hmm, where to begin with Chris?

Let's starts with yesterday. I was online. Chris unexpectedly showed up after 5 PM. I was quite surpised to see him. I haven't see him in a few days since Monday. He had a bag with him. He still haven't found a place to live.

I met Chris on Saturday. I just got back from Vons after 5; I brought some fags and a angel food cake. He dailed up for his friend at Waterloo. His friend wasn't home. So, he invited himself to my place and my life. Really, I don't want to do with strangers.

Christian

Happy

I will do Chris later. I don't mean in a sexual way! LOL

After all, Chris is straight!

Good night.

The FBI

Happy

The FBI paid me a visit this morning. We discussed the hit man, Miguel, attempted murder, homeless, depression, family, HIV, and name change.

They don't want me to post another hit man ad or any FBI agent phone number on the web site.

They pointed out that someone ANGRY could go after the FBI agent.
They warned me if I post another hitman ad, I will be arrested. I don't think the police can arrest me at all. I don't believe in suicide. A hit man is the next best thing for me.

I showed them my depression medication.

They wanted to see my ID. I showed them my ID and SS number. The FBI guy took down notes.

The lady FBI mentioned that they will keep tabs on me. That's pretty okay with me. Hey, no one can go after me! At least, the police or the FBI will know about it. I am safe.

I told them that I haven't seen my family since 1999. I want no part of them whatsoever. My mum want no gay son. So, I am dead to her. I told them that I lost contact with them too and I can't find them either. They mentioned I can find them if I want to. They believed I am good with the internet. The FBI gave me two search engines to look up for my family. That was nice of him.

She wondered about being homeless. In some cases, I wanted to be homeless. Quite true. Homeless from unhappiness (really, the depression) was an escape for me. New York was a tough place to be homeless; it was cold too. I always comes back to LA.

She wanted to know why I am in LA.......that's easy. Sunshine, beaches, the mountains, the palm trees and such.

I confessed about the attempted murder. Yet, I am still a free bird. I got away with a major crime! Ooohhhhh! The police won't arrest me. Lucky me! LOL.

That was the big event of the day........see u whenever!

4.9 Earthquake

Happy

I was watching OLTL till I fell asleep halfway through the soap. It wasn't boring. I was tired.

It was a very short nap. The 5.3 earthquake woke me up from the nap. I thought it was a dream. Then I realized it was the real thing. The bed shook a little. The news interuptted OLTL about the earthquake.

They downgraded the earthquake from a 5.3 to a 4.9 within an hour or so.

We will have more big earthquakes. We had three in a week - Thursday, Sunday and Today. We lived in earthquake country.

Michael Jackson

Happy

The verdict on Michael Jackson - NOT GUILTY on all accounts!

I thought that will happen. Last week, I told my friend, Mike, that he won't be guilty.

The DA didn't have STRONG evidance against Michael Jackson.

Nothing Today

Happy

I did nothing today, except for Diablo 2.

June 4, 2005

Happy

I was still tired when I woke up. I thought about taking Diablo 2 back to Best Buy. I brought the wrong game. I didn't get the Expansion game. I got the regular version. For sure, this week I will take it back for expansion. I still got the reciept.

BIG NEWS - I finally beat Diablo! He was hard to kill. I died over 25 times. First, I killed everyone at his place. Then it was just him and me. It took me about 45 minutes. I killed him all by myself. I get any help from nobody.

Taylor called me about 4ish. HE wanted to come over for a little while. I continued playing Diablo. I heard something being threw at my window. It was Taylor. I brought us some Cheeseburger pizza. I didn't like it that much. Taylor loves that pizza.

Taylor mentioned he is moving to his friend's new place next month. He will pick up his stuff next month. He finally got his bus pass; he can go anywhere any time.

June 3, 2005

Happy

Once again, I woke up about 9. I was tired. I fixed the tape for the soaps. I ate Frosted Flakes 4 breakfast. I put a check in my account. I took the dash bus to Hollywood/Vine. I waited for the bus for five minutes. I got off at Fairfax/Santa Monica. I went to the post office for my mail. I opened a new checking account. I checked my mail again. I went straight home. I watched my soaps That was basicly my day.

June 2, 2005

Happy

I woke up late again after 11 AM. I was still tired too. I watched my soaps. I went to the bank after 2. I need to put some money in the account.. I brought some Frosted Flakes at Jons. I went home. I played Diablo 2 all day long.

All Day Long

Happy

I woke up late; very tired too. I stayed home and play Daiblo 2 all day long.

Talk to Brian for a while on the phone.

May 31, 2005

May 31, 2005
Happy
I picked up my bus pass at APLA. I picked up my mail at the post office. I stopped by WEHO Police station. He said I was at the wrong one. I need to go to Wilcox/Sunset. I dropped by Best Buy for Diablo 2 and other things.

This Past Week

Silly Disco on KBIG!!

This morning, I wanted to file the police report against the hit man, John Smith. I printed out copies of both emails. I added a letter with it too. I woke up after 10. I was still too tired to do anything. My body need more rest. So, I just stayed home and do nothing except play the computer game, Diablo 2. For sure, I will go to the police on Monday.

This past two weeks, I played Diablo 2 every single day. I forgot how to play! I haven't played in a few months. The sad thing is all my characters was gone. If we don't play the game after 90 days, they will delete the characters you created. My favourite is the Sorcess. Magic is my thing!

Oh yeah! I shaved off my hair and the beard. I was clean shaven all over my face. I will do my best to remain BALD. I looked good with it. My head is made for it. I did it few times in the past, but it was only a day or two!

Tuesday morning, I started to play Diablo 2. I didn't went to sleep til the very next night. I played over 36 hours straight with a few breaks!

Diablo 2

Happy

All day long......(can u believe that?)....I played Diablo 2. I loved that game very much.

Deadly Serious

Happy

This is REAL LIFE!

I just reported a crime yesterday. I forwarded A EMAIL from this guy, John Smith, to the local police.

John wants money to kill Steve Carey.

Few days ago, out of the blue, I got a email. He mentioned that he was a professional HIT MAN.

He assumed I wanted a hit man. Really, I didn't seek out for a hit man.

John said he contacted me through A WEB SITE. I have no ideal what web site he was talking about.

I never ever heard of the web site.

I just hoped the police get in contact with me soon.

I don't want to get in trouble for something I didn't do.

He wanted my phone number, but I didn't give him mine.

Detective John Smith

Mischievous

Last night, I got another email from Detective John Smith. I also enclosed an old pic of Steve Carey. I sent him an email this morning.

In a message dated 5/19/2005 3:39:32 P.M. Pacific Standard Time, requiemthirteen@yahoo.com writes:

Mr. Falcon, There are several people named "Steve Carey" in the Greater Los Angeles area.

You are a great detective. You found me before; You came to me through a web site. You have good resources. I didn't seek out to hire a hit man.

You will have to provide additional information. An address, a license plate, a phone number, a date of birth - something to identify the specific person.

I enclosed a pic, the last known pic of Steve. He is quite a chameleon; he changed his looks often. It will be hard to describe him. The rest is up to you. You need to get the 411 yourself. After all, you are a detective with good resources.

I am not an ameteur. If you want me to do work for you, I require the terms of payment to be set before I begin.

There is no further need to discuss anything. You know what you have to do. I won't go to prison for something I didn't do. my hands will be clean. A while back, I tried to kill this girl before and I got away with it. I won't go down for that attempted murder either, just like the hit man. This time, things will be different. I won't be any part of a hit man or anything else.

Give me a number where I can reach you to make arrangements.

I don't give out my number. I don't want the police to trace back the number to me. The email is just fine. Don't get in touch with me till Steve is gone from my life for once and for all. In closing, I really want no part of the hit man mess. Still, I want to kill the haunting past of Steve Carey.

At your service, Smith

Finally!

Happy

I thought about going somewhere today. I wanted to take some pics on Melrose Ave. I haven't did that street yet. I did City Walk, Hollywood and Sunset few months ago. I mostly take interesting areas for pictures.

I realized I still have to pay the water and power bill. It was due pretty soon. I worked on the web site for a little time. I added more pics on the site. I noticed I have some email. I hardly check my mail that often. You know too much spam.

One email got my attention big time - "Deadly Serious." I pondered what it was about. The curiosity got the best of me. I opened up the email from John Smith.

"Kazz Falcon, I saw a web page that said you were looking to hire a professional in the Los Angeles area. I can do the work you want done. We will need to negotiate the terms. At your service, Smith"

I don't know how to respond to the email. I have no ideal at all. No one hardly gets in contact with me about the hit man. I need to think about what I was going to say. I made up my mind. I have to go out to today. It was such a lovely day; the sun was out and the birds was singing.

I set up the VCR for the soaps. We all know I don't want to miss my soaps, mostly One Life to Live. The Police Officer was almost ready to arrest the killer of Paul and Jennifer. They still need to get more evidence. They were so close to arrest "Teddy." I caught the bus and pondered about the email. Hmm, what will I say? I can't get in trouble for something I wanted few months ago.

I thought about getting off on Sunset/Vermont. I still to put some money in the account. It came to me that there was a bank on Sunset/Vine. There was no sense of getting off at Vermount. Sometimes, I forget about the Vine one. Then again, a fire destroyed that bank last year. I stayed on the bus till the water/power company. I paid $25 for the bill. It gave me some credit. The bill was $22.12. I put the check in the account. I got some money out for the rent. Most times, I get a money order early for the rent each month. I don't want to wait till the first. It was getting hot. I caught the bus.

I went to Lucy's for the money order, then I got shrimp fried rice. I filled out the money order. My order was ready. I went home to eat. I made it on time for Bold & Beautiful. Stephanie and Ridge talked about Taylor. Taylor returned fromthe dead few weeks ago. Taylor thanked Bridget for helping out after she died from a heart attack. Brooke come home from work. Taylor and Brooke talked about a new house. Both think the other one should move out. You know it won't happen that way. They won't move out of "their home."

I response to John Smith's email. I mentioned it earlier in this entry.

In a message dated 5/19/2005 8:52:00 A.M. Pacific Standard Time, requiemthirteen@yahoo.com writes:

Kazz Falcon, I saw a web page that said you were looking to hire a professional in the Los Angeles area. I can do the work you want done. We will need to negotiate the terms. At your service, Smith RequiemThirteen@Yahoo.com

We don't need to negotiate the terms. After all, you read the web site about the hit man for hire.

I am still looking for an hit man in LOS ANGELES. I want the hit man to kill Steve Carey. A $2,000 reward will be given AFTER the death of Steve. I am DEADLY serious about the hit man.

Please do your job, PO Smith. I know I won't be disappoint - you are very good at your job. Thanx for getting in contact with me.

LA's New Major

We have new major, Antonio Villaraigosa, the first latino major since 1872 (???). He won't forget where he come from. If his mother was there, she will say to him "Don't declare your victory, declare your purpose!" That is a powerful saying!

I am glad he won.

GET OUT!!

Mischievous Madonna - Express Yourself

I have to get out like now, right now, at this moment in time, like now!

I have been coup up in my place for a week, working on the web sites. I was bored and tired of staying in. I need to get out more. Yet, I was wasting time, not on the web sites, of course! I put graphic arts on the sites. Now, they looked much better.

This past month, my average day have been like this....

Woke up. Eat. Read TV Guide online. Do something on the web. Watched TV (I Love Lucy, The View, News 7, Young& Restless, All My Children, One Life To Live, Cosby Show, The Parkers, News 7, King of The Hill, The Simpsons, Malcolm In The Middle, The Simpsons, then the network lineups.)

I supposed to look for a place to volunteer. I finished school about two months ago. Yet, so soon, I finished school, I quickly fell into BAD HABITS of nothing! I thought I will look every day, but I ended up in the hospital for a week. Since then, I mostly stayed home, doing nothing. What an interesting life I have! NOT!

Last year, I told my teacher I wanted to make something out of my life. That's why I went back to class. I wanted to do something with life. Who wants to stay home all the time? That wasn't a life at all. I guessed someone have to push me to get me going in the morning. Now, I was wasting my time in front of the damn computer every day.

Don't get me wrong. The computer is very useful. I was a artist too. I have to look things up for my art. I can't live without the computer. It is a huge part of my life. I sent some emails out to some places in LA. Glaad was interested in me to do some volunteer. He set me on a date to meet, but I checked my email few days late. I haven't send him another email. Since then, I absolutely doing nothing. It was really driving me CRAZY!!

Mike Crouch

Mike finally came over this evening; he didn't want to go out in the sun. We had some troubles. Really, he got under my skin like he did this evening. He still talks when I watches TV; he won't shut up at all. He forgot to call me. I was surprised to see him at the door. Yesterday, I told him on the phone at Brian's about the new rules of my apartments. No one can climb over the fense; it will be consider trespassing.

I opened the door. it was Mike. I wondered how he got in. I don't want to get in trouble. I thougth he climbed over the fence. He explained the gate was opened. He let himself in.

Day With Brian

Happy

This morning, I made some phone calls to some friends - Brian/Peter, Mike and another Mike. None of them was home. I figured I could spend the day with them. I was coup up in my place this past few days, working on Spirit Alien web site. I put some art on each page. It looks good. I wanted to get out on this beautiful hot day.

I went to the post office in West Hollywood for my mail. The future Dark Vadar was on the cover of Entertainment Weekly. He looked scarey. I called Mike at the bus stop. Even him wasn't home. I took the long ass Bus 4 home. I was in no hurry to get home. I got home after Noon. Get it? Afternoon! LOL

Any way, Brian called me back. They went to breakfast and some errands to do. He thought about going to his mom's today. I convinced him to come over. I haven't seen him in a while. Peter couldn't come other. He spent some time with his friend from out of town. He haven't seen him since high school.

I worked on the web site more till Brian got to my place. I let him in. My black neighbor mentioned that there was a residence meeting few days ago. We got new rules. We need to open the gate for our friends; we need to walk them out too. Also, no one can climb over the fence; it considered to be transpassing. They will call the police too. Well, I won't go out to let my friends in. That's why we have a buzzer. They buzz the number; we let them in. My friend, Mike, climbs over the fence. I was always online.

Brian and I debated about where we eat. I brought up chinese food. He wanted something he haven't had in a while. We settled on Sizzler. I showed him my art designs. He was impressed. I made one each for Brian and Peter with their names. We made it on time for the bus. We waited about a minute. the bus dropped us. We walked to the bus stop. I tripped; parts of the red curb wasn't there. that was some trip! LOL. it was a lawsuit waiting to happen. the bus took us to Sizzler. We had the same thing, 6 oz steak. I had fries; he had the baked potato.

Brian was so happy at his job; he likes working there. One time, he missed the bus connection. He called a taxi cab; he made it on time. another time, the bus broke down. He walked over 69 minutes to work. He told the workers that his transportation was out of whacked. You know, lies! Really, we need to lie sometimes. If they knew he didn't have a car, they wouldn't hire him in the first place. he doesn't want to give up his job for anything.

I told him what happen with Miguel; he wants no part of me because of the letter about the attempted murder. I haven't hear from him in a week. I guessed he 's staying clear from me. I doubts that will last. He will call me back. He won't stay mad at me for long. We discussedthe attempted murder for a while. I don't think the police would ever arrest me. There is no evidence except my confession.

We ate our steaks. We pondered about Costco. I wanted to go, but Best Buy was more interesting. His membership wasn't good any more. We could go in, but we can't buy nothing. We both like Costco, but it was a waste of money. We need a car to shop. The bus wouldn't do us any good. We was heading to Best Buy. We walked up the steps. I realized I forgot something. I rushed back to get it. I hoped it was there. I ran to the table. Yes, i found it! I couldn't live without it. I really need it every day.

Mike returned my phone call. I made it short. Mike mentioned that he swtched hours with a guy. His Saturdays wasn't free. Brian looked at some printers. He may get one soon. I looked at the CD Rom games. Peter needs a game to play. I picked Daiblo 2. Peter can have my old one. I went back to the printers. Brian noticed I was bored. I claimed I wasn't. I was! I explained I need to look at a zip drive. for some reason, my zip drive wasn't working right. I can get my stuff from the disk. Brian shows me something better than a zip drive. I forgot the name of it. We can store more things on it. The zip drive is going away.

I brought Diablo 2. We waited for the bus. We went to his place. He searched for Systemworks for his computer. It was $10 more at Best Buy. He downloaded it on the computer. We watched As The Goes By. Then, I taught him how to play Warcraft 2. He enjoyed the game very much. Even Peter will like it too. I realized it was 11 PM. Damn, it was time for home. I haven't been out this late in a long time. I caught the bus. I made it on time; I didn't miss the deadline for this entry. I was hungry. I didn't ate supper. Sizzler filled me. I checked the emails. I was too tired. I went to bed.

Gaysville

This past week, I have been updating Gaysville, a gay soap. Things are coming along nicely.

But, I have no ideal of when I will write new chapters. I forgotten what I wrote. This weekend, I may go through the chapters to see where I am.

It have been over five years I did the chapters.

More on Gaysville later.

Confession

Happy David Byrne - Like Humans Do

Two weeks ago, I confessed to Miguel and Michael in a letter that I tried to kill this girl. So far, The police have NOT show up on the doorstep. By now, I thought they would call the police on my ass.

Besides, the FBI are investigating me for the attempted murder. The FBI agent, Robert Hawk, sent me an email about a month ago. Maybe, they don't have enough evidence to put me behind bars.

Oh well, I just got away with attempted murder. I continued to be a free man. Who ever thought that the police wouldn't arrest me?

At least, I confessed. The confession was good for the soul. I felt less guilty. I won't have to carry the guilt around any more.

Amazing Race

Uchenna & Joyce, the black couple, are the winners of the Amazing Race.

I just finished watching it; it was truly truly amazing episode. Even the final minutes was pretty awesome. Uchenna & Joyce didn't had enough money to pay the taxi at the finish line; they begged about everyone for money. Rob & Amber were on the way to the finish line. They were still few dollars short for the taxi driver; the taxi driver was kind enough to let them to cross the finish line for a million buck.

I cried big time. The Amazing Race gets better each time. Earlier in the day, I mentioned to a friend that I want the black couple to win. I figured Rob and Amber will win the money instead. Boy, I was wrong about Rob & Amber. I was glad that Uchenna & Joyce won the race. They want to use the money to get preggie. They tried for the longest time, unsuccessful. With the million dollars, they INCREASED their chances for a baby.

Freeway Killer

By Kazz Falcon

The freeway became my new sport
I take aim at people with a gun
I drove up and down the freeway
I looked for victims
They became my easy prey
They least expected the shooting
Even the police had a hard time
I drove different cars each time
I killed so many lately
It thrills me that I got away
It was quite an accomplishment
I never thought it lasts this long
The police haven’t been able to find me
I know the freeway inside and out
I can escape with no troubles at all
So far, nobody follow me
They won’t dare either
I will shoot them from the car
I will continue to be the freeway killer

Eric Braeden's Comment

Sad

Entertainment Weekly (May 13, 2005. Issue #819) has a small piece about the LEGENCY of William J Bell on page 28. there is a picture of Bobby and Britney at the bottom left corner.

Eric Braeden's (Victor Newman) statement caught my attention.

"He anchored stores in reality better than anybody."

That sums up my poetry too. I am William J Bell of poetry!

May 7, Saturday

This morning, i went to the post office in West Hollywood for my mail and sent off the post card to Michael & Miguel. I haven't talk to Miguel in a few days. He probably still mad at me. He haven't call me. LOL. I will wait till a few days til the smoke clears. Hopefully, the post card will make them UNDERSTAND about the letter.

I called Mike from the bus stop, "be there in 10 minutes." I got off at La Cienega and walked the rest of the way. I called out for Mike's name. went to the door. Mike let me in. The dog jumped all over me; he was quite happy to see me. Mike went back putting the plaster by the carpet. I grabbed a orange soda. We talked for a little while.

HE showed me his new pictures in his bedroom. He is really into the pictures. He is talented. A few pictures didn't turned out that well. No bigger thou. All photographers faces the same thing, even me! He took a shower as I checked my email on my AOL screen names. Mike got dressed. I showed him my pictures on YAHOO. He was impressed.

We took out the dog for a little while. I noticed the flowers in front of Mike's building. I took some pictures. I loved taking pics of flowers. I had a bunch of them! We went back in the apartment. Mike gave the dog some treats. We got in his new car. I loved the new car. Mike got a good deal on the used car.

We drove down Santa Monica Blvd. I saw an A Current Affair ad on the billboard on the left by the 101 Hollywood freeway. I said, "Some day, I will be on the show!" I always wanted to be on that show since Maury Povich hosted the program in the late 80's. Yes, I am a huge fan. For some reason, the new host, Tim Green, is not working for me. I don't see him as the host. He does a great job thou. I guessed I was used to having Maury Povich on A Current Affair.

We went driving on Route 66 to take pics. We also stopped by two train shops. Along the way, we ate at the wiener place for lunch. Then, we contunied on Route 66. I noticed a burned brick house on the rihgt side. We both were intrigue by that house. it was perfect for some pictures. We couldn't go in the house. It had a notice. There was no windows at all. It was badly burned. Mike looked around and noticed another building. We moved the car in the parking lot next door. He tried to take pics of the other house. I just stayed in the car.

Mike didn't have much success. There wasn't a away in to the other house. We drove off; Mike turned the car around and back to the house again! Mike finally found a way. He went through the side way. I used the restroom behind the house! LOL. I took more pics at the back of the house. Mike came back; he wondered what this place was before. The house must have a story. It got to! I noticed the house have two bomb shelters below the ground. Man, they were ready for the bombs!

We drove further down the road. We saw some brick houses by the freeway. The house got us curious. I took a pic from the car. Mike got out to take the pics. I stayed in the car. I didn't want to get out at all. He just parked in the busy street. He was impressed by the houses. We traveled again. We were fasinated by the brick building at the corner of the street. We parked in the driveway and took pics. We wondered what the building was.

Then we went back to LA. Mike dropped me off and went home; he was tired to see my new furniture. I brought the stuff at IKEA in Burbank! I loved my furniture. It was my FIRST TIME to buy any. I always get hand me downs! You can do so much with SSI! Yes, I am poor white trash! I download the pics on the computer. I sent Mike some pics. I updated my web sites. I did that in the morning too. I watched Saturday Night Live with Paula Abdul; she was in a funny sketchabout you know who (Corey Clark) and the other contestants. Tonight's SNL was funny. Then I went to bed. Good night!

The Post Card

Happy

Michael Gilbert & Miguel Garcia,

The letter was NOT a mean joke. The FBI Agent, Robert Hawk, sent me a email. He wanted me to call him about the attempted murder. I refused to call him.

I'm deadly serious about the attempted murder & Robert's email. I still have the email he sent me. I won't go to prison - I'm innocense until proven guilty.

Robert's number is 216 622 6611 or 216 522 1400.

Homeless Scorecard

Happy

Homeless Scorecard

1. Fort Worth – I was depressed and ended up in the street for a while to get the feel of the streets. I didn’t tell anyone I ran away from home.

2. Houston – I was depressed. I wasn’t happy living with Granny. I didn’t tell anyone I ran away from home. I was homeless less than a week.

3. Dallas – I made a decision to run away again. This time, I ended up in Dallas. Of course, I didn’t tell anyone. I want my family NOT to look for me. I was homeless for a few months. I made a life there with the help of Kevin Nichols, Collette Shumate, Gary Gonzales and the gay church, Grace Fellowship in Christ Jesus.

4. Dallas again – I wasn’t happy in FW and went back to Dallas. My family didn’t know where I went. I was homeless for a short while till Nick, another homeless guy, and me got an apartment. I wasn’t happy living with Nick and his ABUSIVE boyfriend.

5. Los Angeles – I was depressed in Oak Cliff; Collette noticed I wasn’t happy with my life. I ran away for parts unknown in LA. No one knew where I was. I didn’t know anyone. I was homeless for two years till I got a place at Gower.

6. New Orleans – I got depressed and ran away from home. I lost my Gower apartment.
New York – I took the bus to Atlanta, Georgia. I was homeless for a few days then I left for New York City. The homeless life was much harder. I couldn’t take it after a few days. I went back to LA.

7. Los Angeles – I ended back at The Foundation House in West Hollywood for a few months. Someone sent a "dead"letter to Linda Harris. Linda mentioned to my family that I died from AIDS. My family looked for me and found me at the homeless shelter. Robin persuaded me to go home. I was there for two months. I was depressed and moved back to LA.

8. San Francisco – Miguel was driving drunk; he lost the car, his job and his apartment. Miguel mentioned that I must make plans for a place to live. I was depressed that I was homeless again, thanks to Miguel. Out of the blue on New Year’s Eve 2001, Richard offered me to go with him to San Diego for a week. I persuaded Richard that San Francisco is more fun. I loved SanFran so much that I decided to be homeless. I didn’t want to rebuild my life in LA for a third time. Once again, the homeless life was very hard that I left after a week.

9. Los Angeles – I ended up at PATH for six months. I moved in with Miguel for a while till I got my place on Waterloo. Miguel was pretty upset that I left him. Hey, I can’t trust him. Living on my own was smart move on my part.

Time Flies

By Kazz Falcon

I was 35 year old
The year was 2005
The month was May
Today’s date was the 6th
The time was 1:25 PM
I wondered where time went
I still couldn’t believe it
We were halfway through the decade of 2000
I remembered time was quite slow in my youth
I couldn’t wait to be an adult
I wanted to catch up with the time
Now, time flies up me by
Time disappeared into tomorrow
Where I can’t get that time back
I can’t lose wasted time
I need to use time wisely
Time was too valuable to waste
I wished I could stop time
Or slow time for a little bit
There was one thing I know
I can’t let time slips through my fingers
Because time flies

Freeway Shootings

By Kazz Falcon

I was driving down the freeway in LA
I was on my way home from work
This guy pulled up beside me
I couldn’t see his face
His windows was shaded
He was honking at me
I figured he wanted to get in front of me
I pulled back some
He had some room to get in the same lane
He honked more
I honked back to signal him
He honked once more
I looked over my right shoulder
I moved over to the next lane
He can have my previous lane
I don’t want to deal with that crazy driver
I continued on driving
Further down the freeway, he got behind me
I still couldn’t see his face
He slightly bumped into me
I was frustrated with him
I moved over to the next lane
Once again, he pulled beside me
His window was down
I noticed he had a mask on
That struck me odd
He pulled out a gun
He shot at me a few times
I lost conscious and crashed into a tree
I became a victim of the freeway shootings

Falsely Accused

By Kazz Falcon

I was dripping
I checked it out at the doctors
He mentioned it was STD
He treated me with antibodies
I wondered how I got gonorrhea
I got angry
It must be my lover
He sleep around sometimes
I confronted my lover
He denied it
I claimed we wouldn’t have sex ever again
I don’t trust him any more
I had it up here with his lies
I went to the doctors a week later
Strangely happened, it wasn’t STD after all
He didn’t know what it was
He made a mistake like me
I felt bad about my lover
He was falsely accused

Miguel

Mischievous

Miguel called me couple of times from his brother's place today. I didn't even want to answer the phone. I let the answer machine to pick up. I checked my messages at night.

"Hello, Kazz. Are you there? Hello. Miguel. I just want to tell you I am really upset for what you did to Michael. You send that ugly joke. It was bad. I am not happy at all. He got upset. Call me at Marcelia. Please. Bye."

the letter was not a FREAKING JOKE! Michael and Miguel need to get over themselves!

It really did happened a while back.

Hello! How come Robert Hawk, FBI agent, sent me an email last month? Hmm, because The FBI are investigating me. I still have the email that Robert sent me!

Besides, Miguel wanted to "lie" about me. So, the letter was a perfect opportunity to set the record straight with Michael. After all, I wanted to confirm Saturday evening with Miguel.

Curious In California

"Kazzanova,What is this letter all about, April 30th? Where did this incident happen and aren't you afraid that Miguel will give you away? I must know. I have your secret photos of you know who. What next?" - Curious in California

hello, darling!
i am working on it now................
and, no, i am not afraid that Miguel or Michael would call the police. i am expecting the police to show up. Laters


Side Note: I added the secret picture to this entry. Miguel has a HUGE bump on his face from April 27, 2005.

Defense

By Kazz Falcon

Sunday, May 1, 2005 - Last night, Miguel called me. He mentioned that Michael was angry at him. He cooked for them and Miguel wasn't even home for supper. Miguel cooked for me! Me bad!

Miguel mentioned to Mike that he was there for me because I was crying about some personal problem. In other words, Miguel flat out LIED to Mike.
Wait till Mike get a hell raising letter about Miguel. Even Miguel will be shock by the revelation!

Hey, I want to help Miguel! LOL

Why not? I am such a nice guy! I don't want Miguel to get in trouble with Mike. I want to CONFIRM the truth to Mike in the letter.


Tuesday, May 3, 2005 - 10:10 PM - Miguel called me about the letter; Michael was pretty upset. He wanted to know why I sent it to Michael. I claimed I was on the other line and can't talk at the moment. I told him I would call him back. Miguel said, "No!" I said, "Call me in 30 minutes." I hung up the phone.

Man, the post office was quick. I mailed it yesterday and Michael got it today. Then again, it was in the same zip code, 90069.

Hmm, what will happen next? I assumed Michael would call the police. Well, I won't talk to them. I will plead the fifth!


Depression

Depression – Most feelings of depression are a reaction to an unhappy event. Depression can also appear as irritability, anger, and discouragement rather than feelings of hopelessness and helplessness.

Distorted thought patterns, characterized by feelings of worthlessness, helplessness, and hopelessness are part of the "cognitive triad of depression," and can be a risk factor for depression.

It appears that a tendency toward depression is often genetic, but that stressful life circumstances usually play a major role in bringing on depressive episodes. Problems with depression usually begin in adolescence, and are about twice as common in women as in men.
Noticeably disturbed thought processes, poor communication and socialization, and sensory dysfunction indicate moderate depression.

People with severe depression are withdrawn, indifferent toward their surroundings, and may show signs of delusional thinking and limited physical activity.


The Major Events

1. Loss of a friend or relative

I lost my father in 1973 in a truck accident. Pops was making a left turn and, somehow, hit a telephone pole. The pole landed on the truck and crushed him to death.

2. The attempted murder

A while back, I got into a huge fight with this girl. I was very angry with her. I chased her with a knife. I wanted to kill her. The girl called out for help. Her mother showed up. She told her mother what happened. The mother confronted me, but I DENIED everything. I lied to get out of the mess I created.

3. Suicide thoughts throughout the years.

The first time – I was depressed in high school in 1987/88. I left a suicide note for my friends in class. They told the teacher; my mother showed up in school. The counselor sent to a shrink. I saw the shrink. I told him about my feelings. He didn’t believe me; he thought I was trying to get some attention.

Since then, I know the shrinks are a waste of time and money. They don’t want to help you.

4. Homeless – I was homeless so many times that I tend to run away from life and problems.


The homeless scorecard

A. Fort Worth – I was depressed and ended up in the street for a while to get the feel of the streets. I didn’t tell anyone I ran away from home.

B. Houston – I was depressed. I wasn’t happy living with Granny. I didn’t tell anyone I ran away from home. I was homeless less than a week.

C. Dallas – I made a decisionto run away again. This time, I ended up in Dallas. Of course, I didn’t tell anyone. I want my family NOT to look for me. I was homeless for a few months. I made a life there with the help of Kevin Nichols, Collette Shumate, Gary Gonzales and the gay church, Grace Fellowship in Christ Jesus.

D. Dallas again – I wasn’t happy in FW and went back to Dallas. My family didn’t know where I went. I was homeless for a short while till Nick, another homeless guy, and me got an apartment. I wasn’t happy living with Nick and his ABUSIVE boyfriend.

E. Los Angeles – I was depressed in Oak Cliff; Collette noticed I wasn’t happy with my life. I ran away for parts unknown in LA. No one knew where I was. I didn’t know anyone. I was homeless for two years till I got a place at Gower.

F. New Orleans – I got depressed and ran away from home. I lost my Gower apartment.

G. New York – I took the bus to Atlanta, Georgia. I was homeless for a few days then I left for New York City. The homeless life was much harder. I couldn’t take it after a few days. I went back to LA.

H. Los Angeles – I ended back at The Foundation House in West Hollywood for a few months. Someone sent a "dead" letter to Linda Harris. Linda mentioned to my family that I died from AIDS. My family looked for me and found me at the homeless shelter. Robin persuaded me to go home. I was there for two months. I was depressed and moved back to LA.

I. San Francisco – Miguel was driving drunk; he lost the car, his job and his apartment. Miguel mentioned that I must make plans for a place to live. I was depressed that I was homeless again, thanks to Miguel. Out of the blue on New Year’s Eve 2001, Richard offered me to go with him to San Diego for a week. I persuaded Richard that San Francisco is more fun. I loved SanFran so much that I decided to be homeless. I didn’t want to rebuild my life in LA for a third time.Once again, the homeless life was very hard that I left after a week.

J. Los Angeles – I ended up at PATH for six months. I moved in with Miguel for a while till I got my place on Waterloo. Miguel was pretty upset that I left him. Hey, I can’t trust him. Living on my own was smart move on my part.


5. Missing person report two times.

A. Collette filled out a missing person report in Dallas. I was missing a few days in 1992.

B. Tom Mitchell and Sean Davidson filled out a missing person report in LA in 1998. I was missing for a few days. Tom thought that someone was responsible for my disappearance; my place was in shambles.


6. Sober living – I lived in a sober living house in Long Beach AND Los Angeles to get off the damn streets in 1999.


7. I smoked when I am depressed.


8. Hit Man 4 Hire – I posted an ad on Craig’s List in January 2005. Two months later,the police traced the ad back to my computer. The police showed up and knew I wanted to kill Steve. I was in the hospital for a week in March 2005.

In closing, Robert Hawk, FBI special agent, sent me an email; he wanted to talk on the phone, but I refused to talk to him. I know in my heart that I would get in trouble for the attempted murder.

April 30, 2005, Saturday – I “revealed” the truth of the “attempted murder” to Miguel Garcia. I told Miguel about Robert. Later, Miguel called me, “Michael was mad at me for not being there for supper. I told him that he was there for my time in need.”

I felt bad about Miguel. It was basically “my fault” that Michael was pist off at Miguel. So, I wanted to confirm “the truth” to Michael Gilbert in a letter.

The Letter

Happy

10:10 PM - Miguel called me about the letter; Michael was pretty upset. He wanted to know why I sent it to Michael. I claimed I was on the other line and can't talk at the moment. I told him I would call him back. Miguel said, "No!" I said, "Call me in 30 minutes." I hung up the phone.

Man, the post office was quick. I mailed it yesterday and Michael got it today. Then again, it was in the same zip code, 90069.

Hmm, what will happen next? I assumed Michael would call the police. Well, I won't talk to them. I will plead the fifth!

$300 Big Favor

Happy

This evening at 7:30, Miguel called me for a BIG FAVOR! He wanted to borrow $300 to give to Richard, his longtime friend. Richard will go on vacation soon.

Two weeks ago, Richard lent Miguel $300 to get his passport for work. Well, Miguel never ever got his passport at all. They told Miguel to come back in May for his appointment.

Well, Miguel didn't save the money. I strongly assumed that he spent the money on you know what.

Now, Miguel is out of a passport, a new job AND a dear friend.

Miguel needed the passport for his new job at a restaurant in Santa Monica. I doubt that he still have the job any more. Miguel is a illegal alien.

Things aren't going his way for the new job. Without the passport, he can't work.

I told Miguel I can't give him the money. I am POOR WHITE TRASH! I am on limited income.
Miguel cried on the phone. I wished I could help him, but I know in my heart that I can't trust

Miguel because of his drinking problem.

Miguel needs to find someone else for help. He can't ask Michael for the money. Michael is letting him to stay with him RENT FREE. Michael is out of the question.

Miguel doesn't know what to do about the money. I felt sorry for him. Miguel got himself in the trouble all by HIMSELF!

I won't rescue him. He needs to do it on his own!

Michael Gilbert letter

Happy

This morning, I sent this letter to Michael Gilbert.

Last night, I mentioned I will write to him about Miguel!

This is the letter...

Michael Gilbert,

I wanted to confirm that Miguel was with me on April 30, Saturday night. I ran into some big trouble with an FBI special agent, Robert Hawk.

Robert wanted to talk to me about the ATTEMPTED MURDER. I refused to call Robert. I won't discuss it to Robert. As long I keep my mouth shut, the police can't ARREST me for the attempted murder. No one have hard core evidence. I know in my heart that I will go to prison.
I don't want to lose my freedom.

A while back, I got into a HUGE fight with this girl. I was angry with her. I chased her with a knife. I wanted to kill her. The girl called out for help. Her mother showed up. She told her mother what happened. The mother CONFRONTED me, but I DENIED everything. I lied to get out of the mess I created.

Miguel

Chillin'

Last night, Miguel called me. He mentioned that Michael was angry at him. He cooked for them and Miguel wasn't even home for supper. Miguel cooked for me! Me bad!

Miguel mentioned to Mike that he was there for me because I was crying about some personal problem. In other words, Miguel flat out LIED to Mike.

Wait till Mike get a hell raising letter about Miguel. Even Miguel will be shock by the revelation! Hey, I want to help Miguel! LOL

Why not? I am such a nice guy! I don't want Miguel to get in trouble with Mike. I want to CONFIRM the truth to Mike in the letter.

Besides, Mike is letting Miguel to stay with him till he get back on his feet. Mike is a sweet person! Mike want to move to Palm Springs. Miguel should go with him. It will do both of them some good.

BUT........Miguel don't want to leave LA! He wants to be near me!

10,000 HITS!

Happy

I finally got 10,000 hits on my AOL profile on May 1, 2005, Sunday. I never thought I will get that many hits.

10/6/04 Wed

Silly

6 AM, i woke up. For some reason, the water wasn't working right; it came out very slowly. Damn, I have to take a shower. I need one before I go to school. I took a sponge bath for 5 minutes. I got dressed. I ate Cocoa Pebbles and two bananas. I had a cup of milk. I opened the door. I heard someone talking outside. I went outside. I saw Chuck and the lady with the kid talking. he went in the office. She said good morning to him. I ask Chuck about the water. He looked into it. Few mintues later, chuck mentioned he fix the water. I closed the door. This time, I took a REAL shower. I got dressed.

Before 8 AM, Miguel called me. He sorry he didn't call me when he got home last night. He needs to see his doctors this friday and get some papers for Medical. He talked for the longest time. he told me about his ordeal about his hospital visit. He don't want his sister in law to take him to the doctors this friday. the last time was hell. they waited for the doctors all day long. Even it took him about two hours for his medication, but he didn't pick them up. It was getting later. He got them the next day. He was still on the phone, I brushed my teeth, got ready for school and walked to the bus stop. He finally said goodbye after 12 minutes.

Class was fun; I had a blast with powerpoint. I gave the teacher my work. He explained he needed the outlines too. I printed them out and gave him them. I did great with the work. He gave me the test. I got an 80 on the test. I started the next chapter. I saw a Star in my eyes. I sent an email. After class, I want to Sprint PCS in downtown. I paid my bill. I went home. I watched my soaps. I finished off Tuna Helper. Last 15 mintues of Days, Karina came by for the Newsletter meeting. I completely forgot about it. It was good I didn't went to the post office after class.

There was a good crowd for the meeting. I noticed there were some Good Times tapes on the book shelf. I took FIVE tape with me to my seat. Man, I haven't watch that show forever. Mike called me; he wanted to come over for Oprah and email. I explained I was in the meeting. We chatted in the meeting for a while. Mike called me again; he was on his way. the meeting went smoothly. An hour later, i waited for Mike. I signed off the web. He finally showed up after 3 PM. he climbed the fence. I told him he could have buzz.

I gave Mike the bad news that an astrologer died. I mentioned she did the readings for Nanacy Reagan. He thought I talked about someone else. I was suprised that he didn't know she died. Mike always keep up with it. He finally found the news of her death. he was sad. he checked his mail. I finished watching the soaps on tape. I saw Good Times on tape too. It was good to see that wonderful black show again! I missed that show. I ate an salad. I offered him to eat. Mike wasn't hungry. Later he ate a salad with Tuna! He mentioned he will bring some Tuna the next time. I called him a LIAR!! He always promised that. He claimed he will prove me wrong! Yeah, right! Mike went home at 8 PM.

I watched the last episode of Good Times. Damn, I shed a tear. I believed it was my first time to watch it. Keith/Thelma's one year Anniversary was full of suprises; great ending for Good Times. Her husband got a new football contract with the Chicago Bear as a free agent. JJ finally made it big with his art; his super hero comic strip was a smash! His first paid advance was tickets for the newlyweds. Thelma spilled the beans - she was preggie! Everyone was happy. Willona got a job promoted and moving to the same neighborhood as Thelma/Keith. Florida was moving to help her with the her new grandkid. Michael was off to College. And the GOOD TIMES continued.

10/5/04 Tuesday

Happy

Miguel called me during Y&R. I mentioned I knew he will call me today. We both said sorry about yesterday. It was a big misunderstanding about Highland and Vine. He wondered if I eat lunch yet. Nope, he wanted to meet somewhere for lunch. I told him I can cook for us. He likes that ideal better. I wanted to cook steak, but I changed my mind. He want to eat the moment he gets there. So, I made Tuna Helper during Days Of Our Lives.

I thought Miguel will call after he take an shower, then he will come over. it was two hours later, he called me from Lucy's during my lunch. YEs, I didn't wait for him to eat. Hey, I was hungry! I watched Ellen. He wanted to eat at the mexican restaurant at the corner. I explained I already cooked for us. He offered to buy some coke at 7/11; he will meet me at my place. I decided to suprised him at 7/11. Ron was leaving too. We walked down together. I saw Miguel crossed the street. He was suprised to see me. We went in 7/11. HE brought a slurpee and Dr. Pepper.

We walked back to my place. The women from King Of Queens was on Ellen. HE doesn't remember what show she was on. I played with him, she was on Saved By The Bell. HE gave me a funny look. I told him that she was on his favourite show, King Of Queens. I fixed him a plate of Tuna Helper. I moved the table to the livingroom. We ate together. We watched Ellen; Ellen was taking care of the baby and did the house chores as she took a day off being lazy around the house. LOL. He didn't ate too much. HE was upset about something; he still want to be lovers. he can't stand being apart from me. I mentioned I have a boyfriend and he needs to fix his life. He started to cry. He wanted to go home. I convinced him to stay. We will always be friends. We hugged each other. He took a nap. I finished my plate.

It was getting too hot for us. I turned on the fan. A while later, he needed help to take off his clothes. he wanted sex, but i declined at first. we ended up having sex. he took an shower. i took one after him. i was in the restroom; he got dressed. he mentioned he wanted to leave. I told him he can leave without me. I finally came out of the restroom. He asked, "do u want to walk with me to the bus stop?" I didn't want to. I just want to stay home. Instead, i went with him to Alvarado. We got something about the store. He was kind enough to give me some money. 304 picked him up. I walked home with the water bottle. Miguel promised to call me when he gets home, but he forgot.

10/4/04 Monday

Angry

I arrived at class. Wow! We had a full house. I used the computers on the other side. I noticed some "Don't Use" signs on the computers. I didn't use them. I used one against the wall. I mentioned to the teacher that I was on the other side. He told me that I can use the "Don't Use" computers. It was for the computer class. I started Powerpoint in class. It was easy to learn. I had fun doing it. I like it better than Excel. I finished Excell last friday. I was glad I was done with it.

Miguel called me from Hollywood/Vine after 10 AM. I ran outside to talk to him on the phone. He wondered what I was doing. I was in class till Noon. He offered to buy me lunch. He asked, "What places are close by?" I said, "We can eat at Denny's." He remembered it was by the highway. He will call me when he get there. An hour passed, I haven't heard anything from him. I left class five till Noon. I caught the bus to Vermount/Beverly. I wondered what happened. He should be here by now. He had an hour head start. There was still no signs of him. I sat down at the bus stop. He called me from Hollywood/Viine, "Sorry, I ran into an old friend. We chatted for a while."

I told him that I was at Beverly/Vine. He still wanted to buy me lunch. Somehow, we got our wires crossed. I was going down the elevator. I told him I was going to Highland. He mentioned he has a black shirt on. I waited for the subway. I took the train to Highland. I went straight up and looked for him. I couldn't believed it. Miguel was nowhere to be found. He should be there before I got there. Hell, no! It was only one stop from Vine for him. Somehow, I beat him there. I got tired of waiting and I caught the subway.

Maybe, he was at Vine. I went upstairs. Well, I missed him there too. I waited for a while. I wondered what happened. i got on the Dash bus. Oops, it was the wrong one. It was heading to Wilshire. I caught 217 to Vermount/Sunset. Miguel called me again, this time from Hollywood/Highland. I told him I waited for him there over 15 minutes. All this time, he was at Vine. I got upset with him. I thought we supposed to meet at Highland. I got off the bus at Western; I was this close of going back to Highland. I mentioned I was mad at him. At the last minute, I changed my mind. I got on the same bus. I gotfed up with him. I told him that I was going home. I didn't want to have lunch with him. I was way too angry with him. It was best that I go home. He promised to call me later. He will get something to eat to take home with him.

The Police Raid

By Kazz Falcon

I was a mastermind criminal
I was one of the best out there
The police never caught me until now
I thought I was being smart and careful
I always covered up the crimes
I didn’t leave a trail of clues
Yet, I was being so cocky
I posted my misdeeds on the web at the local libraries
I didn’t want the posts trace back on my computer
I was always one stop ahead of the police
Nobody suspected a thing at the library
I wore disguises to cover up my real identify
The public was intrigue by me
I had a huge following of fans
Some was pretty amazed
The police wasn’t even impressed
My face appeared on America’s Most Wanted
I continued to avoid the police like the plague
I was so sure of not being caught
Man, I was foolishly wrong
I used the computer out in the open
Someone was in my favourite spot – the dark corner
I won’t be at the library that long
I figured I had enough time
I was so deep in thought with the web journal
I lost track of time
The last heist was absolutely fabulous
I considered it to be one of my personal best
The police closed in
It was too late to do anything
I wasn’t ready for the police raid



This entry has 1 comments:

Too true-life has a tendance to speed up like that-I hope you are ok. So were you a club kid? I heard the LA scene was pretty fabulous. Michael Alig is fantastic-I see you think the same-write me if you would like to speack of cabbages & club kings. Be fabulous! nico

*Comment from nicostarr78 - 1/18/05 7:29 PM

Lady Bluebeard

By Kazz Falcon

I purchased a farm near town
The late husband was crushed by heavy equipment
I pocketed another $4,000 in insurance money
Much like my first husband – $8,500
He died from a heart attack
His family cried fowl play
I collected the insurance policy one day after the funeral
I placed a personal ad in the newspaper
I wanted a financially secure man to marry
Few men answered the ad
One by one, they came to live with me
Instead, I killed them for their savings
Their relatives haven’t heard from them in a long time
They wrote to me about them
I mentioned I never saw them
Even the neighbors was nosy
They wondered what happened to my kid
I sent her off to boarding school in Los Angeles
As soon a man came, he soon disappeared
His sons wrote to me
I explained he never show up
Another man deposited his savings in a account
Things was starting to unravel
For the money, I was a bloodthirsty farmer

John Doe

By Kazz Falcon

Who was you?
Where did you come from?
There were no clues about you
No one show up to claim you
You were forgotten
You made a lasting impression on me
The bullet killed you instantly
It damaged your brain very badly
I wondered who did this to you
Was you in trouble?
Who want you to be murder?
It was my job to find out
I gathered up the clues
The bullet was the first clue
I looked in the newspapers
So far, there was no mention of the crime
I searched on the web
I came up with nothing
Something dawned on me
Perhaps, you committed suicide
Some kids saw you floating in the water
The police located a car nearby
We found your fingerprints on the car
There wasn’t a suicide note
The gun was missing
Did someone kill you?
Did you kill yourself?
What was the real story?
Life couldn’t be that bad
I won’t rest till I find out who you was
You must be someone else, besides John Doe

Goals

By Kazz Falcon

I had too much time on my hands
I get bored so easily
I want to do nothing at all
I became so lazy
It was a bad habit
The money made me that way
I don’t have any goals
I lost interest in life
I had nothing to look forward to
Man, my life was so boring
I must do something
But what?
I wasn’t that actively production
I was on SSI for a long time
Maybe, I should do art again
Or, perhaps, some kind of class
It was a good way to start
Perhaps, something bigger will come along
If I don’t set any goals, I wasn’t living
I was dead to the world
Sadly, I was left behind
I need something to shoot for
That was the first goal to set for myself
Goals keeps us ALIVE
It was time to get off my lazy ass
I will do something with my life
I focused on the goals